WARNING!!!! FIRE HAZARD!

I don't know if any of you have seen the news reports or read of the massive amounts of schools that have burned because of children's work that has been hung on the walls of teachers who were ignorant. These teachers had no idea that if they hung their student's stories or proudly drawn artwork that a fire would attack these pieces of work and cause the school burn down! It's so sad! I've spent hours reading and grieving for all the schools that have burned (Haven't you?). And all because of these crazy teachers who wanted to show their student's work! Another reason all these school are burning is because some teachers are ignorant enough to actually bring a couch into their classroom. Nevermind that children love to sit on the couch and snuggle up with a good book and let their imagination wander into never-never land! Or, too bad that some children get sick at school and find comfort taking a nap or resting on the teacher's couch. None of that matters....all that matters is that ALL TEACHERS MUST GET RID OF COUCHES BECAUSE THEY ARE A FIRE HAZARD! It doesn't matter that these children spend hours at school and that some teachers try to make their classroom homey with a couch or the student's work or decorative posters hanging on the walls. No no no no no!!!! We must save all schools from burning. We must make our rooms sparse and lifeless. Take all the artwork from the halls. Take ribbons and pictures off the lockers! We are losing too many schools because of these teachers who have the nerve to include these hazardous items in their rooms. The good news is...our school will be safe! The FIRE MARSHALL has blessed us with his presence and opened our eyes to our ignorance. Our school will take all the papers off the doors (you know...IF there is a fire in the hall, the door will burn faster if the papers on the door catch fire). We will be free of self-portraits adorning our lockers. We will only hang papers on the bulletin board. We will nevermore hang artsy/craftsy decor from our ceilings (for fear of fire). We will rid our rooms of the soft old couch that children love to sit on. I even loaded my old couch up on Saturday and deposited her at the dump! I shed a few tears as we dropped the couch off....lots of stories have been read on that old couch....a few naps have been taken because of a child with a headache.....lots of comforting has been done because of hurt feelings at school..... but that really doesn't matter now, does it???? I'm wondering what we will do with all the books in our rooms? I certainly hope they aren't considered a fire hazard!