I'm Warning YOU!

What a weekend! I rose with the sun on Saturday morning....4:30 a.m. to be exact! Donald was off bright and early and I decided to get on the road and head to Lisa's in LaGrange.....really we had grand plans of heading to Warrington, Texas....home of one of the largest antique fairs ever...the Warrington/Round Top Antique Fair. You may be asking yourself why I have a picture of a yellow porta-potty. That is my story....and let this statement be on the record....I AM WARNING YOU. I have a history of stomach problems...from way back in high school when as a 17 yr. old I spent my Thanksgiving holiday in the Anson Hospital having a barium enema. The diagnosis back in 1972 was that I had a "nervous stomach" and I was put on meds for my "problem"....which consisted of going to the bathroom immediately after eating.

Well....Saturday morning was absolutely beautiful! I saw the sun rise and loved the picture it painted until the sun rose high enough to blind me! I stopped at Starbucks in Temple and grabbed my usual venti skinny vanilla latte and lowfat berry muffin. Loved every bite and sip! Anyway, I began to feel like my stomach might act up, but I was looking forward to my trip and I put the "pain" in the back of my mind....telling myself that it would go away. I surprised Lisa by getting to her house at 8:30 in the morning...we hopped in her Explorer and headed the mere 7 miles to the crowds of people who had gathered to buy or barter or browse or binge! We headed to our favorite spot...Junk Gypsies and decided that the prices on t-shirts had sky-rocketed and we just "browsed"! We set out on a journey to find the "cheapest cute stuff" we could find. Before long, we were starving and I decided that some food on my stomach would make me feel better. We found foot long State Fair corn dogs and some ribbon fries and a much need table under a shade! After filling our tummies, we set out in search of a bargain. It didn't take long for me to start looking for a porta-potty. As much as I hate to "go" in one of those things, I knew I HAD to find one. We knew exactly where to find one...there were some located behind a barn and there were shade trees near them....as well as some tables and chairs near (but far enough to be on the safe side). Now....this is where you may want to sign off........

I was sick....really sick....like I was not gonna make it sick! I locked myself into the "yellow box" and started sweating. I really wanted to die....now this sickness I have gives me, you know...the "D" word. And I don't like having "D" in a "yellow box", but there was nothing I could do. I sat and sat and sweated and sweated for about 15 min. Wearily, I shuffled back to where Lisa was sitting and I told her again about how sick I was. And then it hit me again...I had to go back...once again I was in the "hot yellow box" for about 20 minutes....I returned to Lisa when it hit again....and I scooted on back to the "stinky hot yellow box". This time I was sure I was gonna die. I was so hot....I can't believe I feel the need to tell you all this but...I'm thinking it might make you feel better about yourself if you are ever in my shape......well, I was so hot, began to take my clothes off. Off came my shirt and my capris....just sitting there in my bra and panties....sick and sweating. Lisa came to check on me and I actually had her to open the door for me while I sat there...until someone came near. My hair and body was dripping with sweat. I finally dressed (hard to do in one of those things...) and returned to Lisa. About that time, an answered prayers occurred...the lady that lived on the property near the porta potties, drove up. Lisa actually knew her and went over to tell her I was sick and asked if we could go into her house so I could use her bathroom. Honest Injun....I went into a complete stranger's house to go to the bathroom! Oh...it was wonderful....the air conditioner was on and a blast of cold arctic air hit me in the face as I entered the stranger's house. It had to be turned down to at least 55 degrees and I didn't even think twice about the big black pit bulldog that was sitting on the couch when we walked in. It felt wonderful. I sat on normal "potty" in a normal bathroom and I began to feel as if I was gonna survive! After about an hour of being sick....I felt better. The "sickness" always seems to leave as quickly as it arrives. I looked back on the events of that horrid hour and asked myself if I really sat naked in one of those "yellow boxes". Oh...it was bad...I just can't tell you how bad, BUT once we left the lady's house, we set out with a new outlook on life! Poor Lisa...she had to wait on me and my sickness...but thank goodness she was there to open and shut the porta potty door for me! In order to remember my stay in the "yellow box", I found some really cute "yellow box" flip flops and I bought them. They actually made me feel much better!